Sunday, September 30, 2012

Back from the dead

What do you do when someone you imagined was living under a bridge makes a reappearance? While I'm tempted to put the old Color Purple curse on them, but I've instead decided to kinda hope (with a huge bit of pessimism) that he will come around. It's so hard to not be bitter, but when there are children involved ALL bets are off. Oh, I'm taking it to the next level...my kids deserve this. I may not be cursing you, but I'm coming after your ass that's for sure!

Thursday, September 13, 2012

It's been a while

It's been a while since I've last posted and boy have a lot of things been going on!  School has started back and it has been a struggle getting motivated on daily basis.  I'm trying not to solely focus on the upcoming breaks as a means to get me through the week :).  The kids are great though, so that is a great comfort. I like them and they like me. I think anyway.  I've been working out like a slave in the gym, going at least 5 times a week.  My peeps think I'm crazy, but I'm doing it to keep myself sane. With all that is happening or rather not happening, it's the only thing I've got. 
After a very short stint on Plenty of Fish, I've given up on the idea of ever dating again.  It's just not for me. Or as the kids say, I'm not about that life right now.  It sucks because I would love to have someone to share my life with again, but it seems like it's just not in the cards for me right now.  I've thought that once my son graduates high school which is a terribly long 5 years away, I could begin to see what's out there, but that seems so far away it's unimaginable. It kinda makes me sad.  My mom even told me that my status updates on Facebook were making me sound desperate. I told her I disagreed and that my friends knew my situation and sympathized with me.  She really seems to think that if I return to my home state Virginia, that my life will be drastically different.  She thinks that the men will come falling out of the sky and the money will just flow like water.  I on the other hand know that to be the complete opposite!  It's as expensive as HELL to live in VA and while the men are properly trained in the ways of Black women (always a good thing), I don't believe the hype. 
I don't really know where my place is, but in reality I can't go anywhere once Daniel is done with high school.  I've got a career with retirement benefits and if I leave so do my years on the job.  No thank you!
So I guess, I can just plan on having "the boy" live with me for the rest of my life and take care of me til I die! Ha ha ha! That sounds so morbid! Times are tough.  Let me go watch my favorite movie SOMETHING NEW and get my relationship woes soothed for an hour and a half.  Romeo, Julio, James where for art thou?