Yet another lesson learned

Sometimes in dealing with people you learn about yourself. You learn what you as a person are made of. I've recently been in a situation where I could have reacted one of two ways and I happened to take the high road. I'm very proud of myself in the fact that while I could've chosen to be bitter and vindictive, I've chosen to see the experience as yet another lesson learned and have kept it moving. Am I dissappointed? Sure. Am I surprised? Not for one second. Maybe that has a lot to do with my reaction to said situation. So it is with this new lesson under my belt that I continue to move forward in my quest for companionship if not love. Aren't we all out for a little companionship? I don't think I'm asking for too much really. Onward and upward as they say.

Pot Stirrers aka Shit Starters

How do YOU define a Shit Starter? I've decided that people that NEED to be in the middle of everything are befitting of that wonderful title.  They may have good intentions but I sometimes think it borders on sociopath behavior (too far). Either way, I Ain't Got Time for that (Thank you Sweet Brown) so shit starters, pot stirrers attention: Please GO GET YOUR LIFE!!!! And while you're at it, Please SIT ALL THE WAY DOWN AND PUT A DAMN SEAT BELT ON!!! (Thanks Tamar Braxton)

Shop my AVON store!

 It's been a while, but you know I gotta get my holiday hustle on! Check out the great stocking stuffer ideas for all ages at my site. You won't be disappointed, I promis you!
Shop my AVON store!: Here's a sneak peak at some of the latest products available at Avon. Be sure to click

Back from the dead

What do you do when someone you imagined was living under a bridge makes a reappearance? While I'm tempted to put the old Color Purple curse on them, but I've instead decided to kinda hope (with a huge bit of pessimism) that he will come around. It's so hard to not be bitter, but when there are children involved ALL bets are off. Oh, I'm taking it to the next level...my kids deserve this. I may not be cursing you, but I'm coming after your ass that's for sure!

It's been a while

It's been a while since I've last posted and boy have a lot of things been going on!  School has started back and it has been a struggle getting motivated on daily basis.  I'm trying not to solely focus on the upcoming breaks as a means to get me through the week :).  The kids are great though, so that is a great comfort. I like them and they like me. I think anyway.  I've been working out like a slave in the gym, going at least 5 times a week.  My peeps think I'm crazy, but I'm doing it to keep myself sane. With all that is happening or rather not happening, it's the only thing I've got. 
After a very short stint on Plenty of Fish, I've given up on the idea of ever dating again.  It's just not for me. Or as the kids say, I'm not about that life right now.  It sucks because I would love to have someone to share my life with again, but it seems like it's just not in the cards for me right now.  I've thought that once my son graduates high school which is a terribly long 5 years away, I could begin to see what's out there, but that seems so far away it's unimaginable. It kinda makes me sad.  My mom even told me that my status updates on Facebook were making me sound desperate. I told her I disagreed and that my friends knew my situation and sympathized with me.  She really seems to think that if I return to my home state Virginia, that my life will be drastically different.  She thinks that the men will come falling out of the sky and the money will just flow like water.  I on the other hand know that to be the complete opposite!  It's as expensive as HELL to live in VA and while the men are properly trained in the ways of Black women (always a good thing), I don't believe the hype. 
I don't really know where my place is, but in reality I can't go anywhere once Daniel is done with high school.  I've got a career with retirement benefits and if I leave so do my years on the job.  No thank you!
So I guess, I can just plan on having "the boy" live with me for the rest of my life and take care of me til I die! Ha ha ha! That sounds so morbid! Times are tough.  Let me go watch my favorite movie SOMETHING NEW and get my relationship woes soothed for an hour and a half.  Romeo, Julio, James where for art thou?

I've found the BEST website EVER

In my search for inspiration and information about health and fitness, I've come across a website called gokaleo.com.  This website is absolutely fabulous! It has great posts that are speaking to the author's experience while at the same time reiterating that every BODY is different. One that works for one may NOT work for everyone.  Her large take home message is: do what feels right for you and your body.  That everything she support just may not work for you., and what you feel that works for you, no one should judge you either
I'm telling you right now..check this out and you will be forever changed! You cannot blame me for the changes you'll make, but you will be so glad that you didn't listen to me.  Ever heard of Pinterest? Well, her site is like Pinterest for fitness and nutrition. 

AND if you think that's inspirational? Wait til you click on this link : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziSQHEmWR6k&feature=youtube_gdata_player
You wanna talk about inspirational!? Every time I'm at the gym and feel like quitting I think of this awesome woman! She is truly an inspiration and I only hope to be one half as sassy and FIT as she is! I love her.

Made him an offer he couldn't refuse

Today I went to dinner with my daughter's boyfriend tonight. He was the most nervous person  in the world tonight. When I picked him up, I told him that I had my knives at the ready if he got out of hand. Enter nervous laughter. I took him to Culver's for burgers and frozen custard where I learned all I wanted about him. And even though he's got gauges (which he sort if regrets) he is a VERY nice boy. I knew he was nice so I wasn't surprised that we spoke so freely and candidly. I'm hoping that he learned a bit about me too in the process. My daughter is no fool, as she was not raised by one!

Plenty of Crap

So, at the urging of my friend in Md and out of sheer boredom, I decided to place a profile on the free dating website Plenty of Fish.  I put up some cute pictures from my European jaunts this past summer and made a pretty funny introduction as well. 
Amazingly enough, within minutes I had messages in my inbox from guys telling me how beautiful and funny they think I am.  This is WAY different from my previous Match.com debacles! I chose to do Plenty of Fish because number 1: It's free and number 2: It's free.  What I'm finding out from reading a number of men's profiles is that this site is pretty much deemed a cesspool by the men listed there. I think that's pretty damn funny! Who knew there would be deceit and debauchery on the Internet!? 
While I thought I had hit the jackpot with all the interest I had received, I was dumfounded to learn that the majority of the messages started off with: "You're beautiful, or You're sexy, or You're hot" Three sentences starters that are a definite turn off! Those messages get deleted without a second thought. Moving on! I have received messages from guys who are up front about them being married and separated but yet still want to "date". What the hell is that about?!  You are full on married and on a dating site! I can't imagine the tramp that would be down for that. She  certainly is not me. And as for the separated guys...same rules apply. I've sent them on their merry way with well wishes for them to find resolution in their marital situations and made it clear that I was never going to be one to disrespect the instution of marriage unlike them. 
So, I've got this 30 y/o trying to talk to me right now. Yeah, I know 30! What the hell and I thinking? Well, I'm grown, he's grown and we are going to get married or have babies. Where's the harm in having a little fun?  He starts off by telling me that he is a manager of a resort on the North side of town. Already, my red flags go up. GM of a resort at 30? I don't think so.  When I asked him if he studied Hospitality in college he said he'd worked his way up. Yeah right! I was born 41 years ago, not yesterday! People laugh at me when I put the term allegedly in front of EVERYthing anyone's ever told me that I am even slightly skeptical about. But with this guy....oh that phrase comes flying out of my mouth! 
So, I sent him another recent picture of me at his request. No problem, I'm good. I keep it looking right and tight, and I believe in truth in advertising, so I have nothing to worry about.  He on the other hand had sent me a picture that was clearly 3-4 years old (a shirtless one no less) of him holding presumably his child.  I have no problem with the kid, or the tattoos across his chest, but when he said he had a soul patch (don't judge me) and it was missing, I knew something was up. An alleged soul patch that is. :) 
Over the next day we communicated like crazy and he asked me to come and meet him at his job as it was allegedly only him and the housekeeping staff. Really? At a resort in TUCSON? No guests....? Must be a sucky resort if you ask me. Then he was being really short with me. A total departure from the other day, and when I asked him why he was so short he said that he was bummed out because he is working on getting a car. A what? A damn car!? You are on a dating site, trying to holla at me and you don't have a damn car? Oh hell to the naw! I can't be arsed to deal with someone without a damn car! Mr. GM my butt! I clown my daughter daily for dating a 21 y/o without a car. You think I'm gonna deal with this dude! Hell naw! And to top it off, I've gotten the impression that he is FAT! No thank you! I mean I work hard to keep  my body in top shape and if you don't do the same, I just can't be bothered.  I don't expect Mr. Olympia, but damn, a gut? Nope, not for me.
So I didn't hear anything from him at all yesterday and I got the impression that he was coming to the realization that his not having a car was going to be a great hinderance to us hanging out, because if you can't even meet me half way without having to spend three hours on a bus, his not having a car would not work out.  Then, I got a message at 11pm. Him: Hey you.  Me: I ignored it til this morning when I replied: Hey! Have a good day.  Him: You too. Loo (what the hell does loo mean?) Me: Hey! Can I ask you to send me a current picture? No response yet.  The truth will come out soon enough. If he's fat he's got to go. Let's be honest, he doesn't have a car, so he needs to go. Just a matter of semantics really.  He's a goner! Plenty of Fish by butt, the blog title is correct.

I'm Worse Than California

California has a three-strike policy in place for their penal system. I however employ a two-strike policy when it comes to dealing with me. This all stems from me stepping outside my box of requirements or wants with regards of potential. There is this guy that has pursued me for a while now, and despite the fact that he drinks like mad and smokes (total deal breaker), I gave him a chance.
First, he promised to take me to Caruso's on a date for some great Italian that I live for. He never followed through. Then, me and my crew were going out to the Cactus Moon so I decided to give him a second chance to show and prove.  He no called no showed, giving a lame excuse the next day,apologizing and assuring me it wouldn't happen again. Not believing him for ONE second,I asked around for opinions on how to proceed knowing all along that I was DONE with him.
So I messaged him letting him know exactly where I stand and told him I'm done. Just goes to show you that sometimes stepping outside your box could be a good thing, but you should trust your gut and choose wisely. On to the next! Til next time..deuces!

Apple Annie's

Today, I went down to Willcox Az to go to Apple Annie's Orchard for some fresh fruit and veggies. Thank God for my navigator Angie because I know without a shadow of a doubt that I woulda ended up in Mexico! It's always nice to spend time with family and today I spent it with my girl Veronica and her family. My son was supposed to come but he had an attack of the toodlyoops and was not gonna be able to leave the porcelain throne for a while. Poor thing.
We went to pick some peaches before Angie and I went on to get the veggies. Today's haul: Apple pie, peaches,a delicious honey butter, squash, zucchini, green beans, sweet corn and a huge watermelon! I suported local business and at least reduced their carbon footprint....being eco friendly is gonna taste so damn good! Get out and find your local farmer's market if you are not near a farm or orchard and get some of this eco deliciousness! Til next time. I gotta go cut that melon! Deuces

I Fell Into a Wormhole

Oops I did it again. I erroneously walked into the casino last night and when I left there this a MORNING, I was completely jacked up thinking it was the same day. Being able to walk outta that joint breaking even is a WIN for me. But just like every time, I know I need to be rid of this habit. And yet, I know that emphysema be damned, the ringing bells and random yelling will pull me back in a again!

Swimming with the sharks

Me and my work out partner had a usual crazy work out tonight at the Platinum Fitness gym. We started with our Body Jam class, where we spent half the time laughing at ourselves (especially silly since we were in the damn front row!). After Jam, she decided that she wanted to work on legs, so I showed her a few of the exercises that Kenny aka Kill Kenny showed me.  Again laughing at how much we were actually sweating. And then it happened..one of the WAIT the biggest dude in the gym starts asking all kinds of questions of us; Am I training her, what exercises are we doing next, what body part are we working on next? etc... When we were on our way to work on abs, he was eyeballing us, so I went and introduced myself to him. Biggest guy in the gym ....Named ROMAN! Really? For Real? Turns out my partner knows this guys brother and could not be bothered to give him the time of day. So when he told me to tell her that she should give him her phone number, that created a bit of a ahem...problem.  So when he followed us to the core station I knew he wasn't going to back down, so I went and told him that she was scared  and a bit weirded out since she knows his brother never mind that fact that he has her by at least 1 1/2 feet and probably 150lbs! ha ha. So we moved on to the pool where we like to just float around and chit chat. Tonight would be different. There was a larger gentleman getting his fitness in (big ups to the big man!) but as he was backstroking past us, it was literally like we were at Breakers Water Park. We literally were clinging to the edge of the pool and of course wincing and dodging to try to keep our hair from getting wet! No luck. So then we decided to go to the Jacuzzi for a change of pace. Within three minutes of hot bubble heaven, our eyes were burning so bad we had to kill the bubbles and just chill with the jets. We went back inside after laying out (in the dark) and relaxing and "complained" to our new friend Everett inside.  He has been putting up with us for awhile and has just recently began to take a shine to us and our antics. Oh yeah, they're all paying attention to these chicks focusing on their fitness. So, anyway to shut us up (yeah right) ...why did he wink at me when he gave us a handful of entry tickets to our gyms drawing??? We each must have like 50 entries in there in the past week! If we win something (other than a stupid t-shirt or water bottle of course) I guess our antics will have paid off.  Here's hoping! Til next time. Deuces!

Italy at a glance

Now, England was a bit low key, whereas Italy and my girl Fabrizia .....whew this girl kept me moving!  You wonder how it's possible to eat like they do/ I did and not gain a single pound even after all the dessert in ENGLAND? I'll tell you how-WALK YOUR ASS OFF!!! I had no concerns that Fabrizia would make this trip just as memorable as in '03 and she did not let me down one bit! I kept a daily journal and suffice it to say that it was a necessary evil for me to keep track of all we did and saw during my visit.  And it all started with a party the minute I got off the plane (just like last time I'd like to add). It was supposed to be a kid's party, but the adults were eating and drinking (myself included) more than any kid present. The host offered me a glass of Prosecco, which I told politely declined and he so lovingly informed me that I WOULD be having a drink, so...when in Rome...Cut to the 2nd glass of Prosecco and I think a glass of Muscato. Let's just say that I've never drank more on this vacation than EVEN Puerto Rico (and that was a lot of drinking). Everyone just kept reminding me that I didn't have to drive. Ha Ha, right. Pour me another will ya?  Fabrizia, Baby Leo and myself went off galavanting around North Eastern Italy and Slovenia daily. I'm pretty sure the day we spent in Potoroz and Piran, Slovenia were even tough on her. This girl can walk and along with myself, she was complaining the next day that her legs were hurting her too.  I didn't know if I could push through one more day of walking but somehow I found the strength and had another great day exploring.  Fabrizia and Gianpi have some of the greatest people for friends I've ever had the pleasure of meeting, from that first party, to the Italy/Germany football match complete with Cevapcici (I love Cevapcici!) and you guessed it more Prosecco that we had to keep drinking to keep Germany from scoring.  There was also Elena and Pierro that treated us to a dinner of my also new favorite Tigelle followed by some of that ever so delicious gelato.  Elena and Pierro are two of the funniest people ever! Not to be out done by good ole Maurizio and his Germany shirt and Italy underwear...and the forced drinking.  There was never a dull moment with this group and I'm am so thankful to have gotten the chance to know them even if just a little bit.
Fabrizia and I went to so many places, like the Sagra event with my very FIRST taste of Cevapcici, Potoroz and Piran, Slovenia for the amazing seaside beaches and nudity to boot (weird at first), I swear we walked for at least 10km that day. We went to Padua (or Padova) a former Venetian city and saw some of the most beautiful churches that literally rivaled any in Venice. St. Michael's was amazing. Saw St. Luke's relics, and St. Anthony's for his tomb (which was incredibly touching). I toured Muggia by myself for half a day while Fabrizia studied and somehow got lost and ended up in a Post Office where one person spoke English...I figured while I was there to play it off and just get some stamps for my postcards! Who does that? ME, that's who!  I found the castle and the gelato shop for some of the best gelato I'd had. And even contemplated going to get another scoop while I waited for the ferry to take me back to trieste.  That in itself was fun. I literally was laughing to myself as the only thing in my mind was Otis Redding's Sitting on the Dock of the Bay while I waited for my ferry to come. It was hilarious! We went to Grado, Italy, Lubiana-the capital city of Slovenia and Lipiza, Slovenia-where the Lipizzaner horses hail from. Amazingly, every Lipizzaner horse in the world has come from the line of horses at this stud farm! And lastly, Aquiliea for the Roman Gladiator reenactments.  Whew! I told you it was busy! I'm so grateful to Fabrizia and Gianpi for being so kind in opening up their home to me and to Leo for letting me use his room and letting me into their lives for a while.  Mama Salvi for making that awesome Eggplant Parmesean (and for my lovely journal and pen) and Mama Barbieri for those delicious meatballs too! Yummy!I've decided that Europe is where I want to be as a result of the connections and interactions that I've had this vacation. I can't wait to come back!

England at a glance

During my stay in England with Dawn, Billy and Sean, we did so many things.  We mostly stuck to areas that were nearby Rugeley as we all are probably aware of the challenges of traveling with an infant for long distances by car especially.  That said, they (not only Dawn and Billy, but the ENTIRE Jones clan) made my visit there as memorable as I knew it would be.  From touring Staffordshire with Grandma and using her handicap placard to park ANYWHERE we wanted to and eating at the Soup Kitchen (which up until the point that we arrived I thought it was an ACTUAL soup kitchen in the American sense. Thank God it wasn't and we had a lovely meal where I had the best baked potato I have ever had in my LIFE!!!of course complete with dessert. When you are with Grandma you eat dessert...there's little discussion to the contrary.   We also saw the world's first Iron Bridge (the birthplace of the Industrial Revolution), went back to Victorian times at Blists Hill where Dawn "won" a coconut and I LEGITIMATELY won my little cup and ball game :) It was really cool to change our current money for the currency of the time and do business with it instead.  That is also where I had my first traditional fish and chips...which were absolutely delicious! I couldn't eat it all so I just wrapped up my leftovers and stuffed them in my purse.  They were yummy reheated too. Sure makes the fish and chips at the Voyager restaurant where I work look ridiculous! After my leftovers we had a few scones (warmed up... ha ha) and of course a glass of Pimms of which Dawn is the resident mixologist and she does a great job with that yummy yummy drink!.  Then we went off the feeling like we were in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory with our tour of the Cadbury Chocolate Factory. They gave us so much chocolate it was ridiculous. My kids really appreciated me bringing it back to them. They loved the Crunchie and the Curly Whirly the best.  We also  paid our respects at the National Arboretum where they honor their lost soldiers. It was a wonderful momument and even though the weather was not cooperating (the coldest and rainiest day yet) being able to touch the names and experience that site was remarkable.  And how could I forget out trip to the National Brewery? SAMPLES!!!! Yes, even though beer is not my drink of choice (PIMMS is though) I did try the samples and actually found beer not to be as bad as i thought when you learn of it's ingredients and processing.  
We were joined by Dawn's mom on a visit to Lichfield Cathedral which was beautiful and then she treated us to lunch in town where I got to see the local town crier walking about. A missed photo op! Dang, but our lunches were a delicious treat! Dawn and Billy were sure to make sure I had the foods I had wanted to try since the last visit and I did just that with our last meal at the Ash Tree where I had my Steak and Ale Pie which was absolutely yummy! It was so filling, this was the one time that NO one, not even Sean had a dessert.  
In addition to our meals out, I had delicious meals cooked by Dawn and her mom (the Roast pork was ace) and Dawn made some kick ass lasagna too.  I would also like to mention that I actually had the opportunity to visit Dawn's dad at work at the Rugeley Fire Station where we actually sat in on an in-service training for them. It was especially exciting when we sneaked out a shirt for me and then they got an emergency call.  Grandma Jones made some of the most delicious deserts (or pudding as they refer to them) A damn delicious homemade Cheesecake for desert for Father's Day and then we had a scrumptious homemade cake for Mama's birthday! Made me think of my own grandma baking from scratch and us kids fighting for the mixer paddles and licking the bowl.
Overall, I'm just a truly blessed person to have all of these wonderful people in my life.  Who knew being the Female BLACK Austin Powers would lead to such great things for me! I'm forever grateful and will remember this time forever. Especially when I put up my bunting for the start of the Olympics even though I know my neighbors will think I'm a right NUTTER, but if anyone asks I will proudly tell them that I'm just reppin' for my family across the pond! Til next time. Deuces!

Back in the Saddle

So, I've finally been able to make it to this computer. In all honesty, I think my friends have a little something to do with my absence. Since I've been back I've been avoiding this PC like the plague. And all because they both had laptops at my disposal. Seems so antiquated to us this monstrosity, but it must be done.  So where do I begin to catch you up on on the happenings. I figure I'd do one country one post...the abridged version...

technical difficulties

Due to unforseen technical difficulties. I will be doing double duty to get you all caught up on my life's happenings within the next few days. Computer use is at a minimum and I've been kept running nearly non-stop for the last week! Point in case, I'm on the computer 1:40 am typing THIS when I should be sleeping as we are off to the capital city of Slovenia which I'm not even gonna try to spell. Then as soon as we get back from that we are off to a music festival. So, keep your eyes peeled for the new link cuz it might be up sooner than you think. Even if I have to stay up all night to do it! yeah right! Til then....dueces!

Whoopi Goldberg?

In talking with the Hinds, Jones and Kydd families today it was decided that the one and only Whoopi Goldberg should play me in my life's story! What the hell is that about?  I tried to see the rationale in that selection as I'd chosen Angela Bassett to play me if need be.  Who can honestly shoot for Taraji or Halle these days? No one, that's why I picked for the more acceptable choice of Angela.  I would like to think and I kinda pray that they've chosen Whoopi for her comic timing and general hilarity, not the fact that she and I have a scarily similar hairdo.  God, I hope it's because of the humor!  Even talking with them later about this, they all STILL agreed that that would be the be actress to play me, so I guess it is Whoopi indeed...that is if Angela is not available.  Til next time.....Dueces!

A Stark Reality

My friend in England just told me today that the women in England are not given their first gynecologic exam until their 25th birthday! That is so completely shocking and scary to me, I can hardly think straight. The amazing amount of women who's lives might be saved by early detection is unimaginable. We were also just discussing mammography too. It turns out that they are not allowed a mammogram until age 50.  That is just as unbelievable too.  The men are not to be left out either, turns out my friend has been having a bit of trouble with his ummmm.....business and this could potentially be something serious but he has not been able to get an appointment for a few weeks from his first complaints.  I would be interested in finding out their cancer rates. 
I am a Health Teacher... ha ha ha ha ha.
Now for a bit of  "comic" relief.  The difference between America and England with regards to exploitation of idiocy is maybe not such a jump. Recently, a young lady was high on some Benzo Fury running naked through their local Tesco grocery store.  This morning this chick was on a show similar to our Today show.  Plus, the news reports on-line have included numerous pictures of this young lady with her breasts prominently displayed.  It seems that she, and her drug induced frenzy has now guaranteed her at least a spot on Page 3 if not surefire infamy.  I think at least in the states, they would have posted her mug shot instead of the sexy shots of her in the reports of the story.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2159650/Benzo-Fury--10-legal-high-Katie-Wilson-19-parade-naked-Tesco.html

In defense of Madonna, Tina and Kathleen Turner

I know you are like: "What the hell"? What is this all about? After being in England for less than three days I found myself speaking with a weird diluted American "accent".  I can completely understand why those above mentioned ladies have grown accustomed to speaking in that questionable accent.  I figure it is because we find that our "accent" seems to be extremely exaggerated and oddly tinged with a southern drawl.  I keep finding myself, when speaking with my friends that I am either speaking much slower and pronunciation or speaking with a pigeon English accent.  It is completely weird, but my friends are getting me back by making me say certain words and their pronunciation of the city Birmingham is an exaggerated southern tinged effort.  When we went to Birmingham they asked me to say it my normal way and then their "proper" pronunciation of Burrmingahhhhm.  Fun times for the whole family.  I have explained to them how I understand Madonna's predicament, as I've only been here a number of days and she's lived here for years.  Imagine if I lived here for a extended period, you know I would sound damn near like a native!!! Yeah right.  I just wanted to throw it out there, that maybe those ladies have an ear for accents like I do, and their current speak pattern can't be helped...it was learned.  God help me when I'm off to Italy in a few days! I have a feeling I will sound like a right confused idiot! Til next time...Deuces!  Arrivederci!

Fish and Chips

Today we had a busy day...we went Blists Hill for trip back in time to the Victorian Era.  We changed our money to the old money of the time and were able to experience the ways of old.  It was a mining area and it actually was the birthplace of the "industrial revolution" Very educational!  Billy even went into a bar and asked for a lager and the barman looked at him like he was crazy.  He explained to him that there was no lager in Victorian times so Billy had to settle for a cider instead.  We had some delicious fish and chips there too, so good in fact that I was not able to finish my food and am going to eat the rest in a matter of minutes as a matter of fact.  I've also been treated to cream team dinner of scones with sultanas, raspberry jam and double cream along with a glass of Pimms as an "appetizer". 

The funniest thing about England is that the weather is cold here...although they think that 60 degrees is HOT, I know HOT and 105 degrees is hot, and that's how hot Tucson was today.  Kinda thankful I missed that one while I was rockin' my hoodie while we were playing tourists. 

Mexican.....NY Style Pizza

You are now looking at the Mexican Food section of Morrison's in England.  This is a large grocery store and while they have a very diverse population in England, Mexicans are not part of that group.  I just happened to catch a commercial on T.V that actually had a mariachi band on there advertising for Doritos! Talking about: Make it Mexican-Make it Doritos!! What the hell!  I was supposed to make them an authentic Mexican meal of Enchiladas and rice, but when I saw this section I knew that was NOT going to happen. I stood there for like 10 minutes trying to figure out what I could do, and then decided that I would slap myself out of shame for producing anything from this sorry selection! And then I found a damn NY Style Pizza that had the nerve to have Pastrami and damn PICKLES on it! I wish a New Yorker would! Really....

Soup Kitchen for 1?

We went into Staffordshire with Dawn's Grandma and it was really nice.  Staffordshire is a small town with great charm.  The day before when we were hanging out with her grandma she had mentioned something about she had her friend were going to eat at the soup kitchen.  My thinking of a soup kitchen is not the same as what we found when we went to The Soup Kitchen. It turns out it is a very nice restaurant with excellent service.  I had a great meal of roast chicken and a jacket (baked) potato followed by a delicious chocolate brownie with ice cream.  Gillian took me to Graham's fire station and got to meet the boys and see all of their fire trucks.  It was cool.  They actually got a call as we were leaving.  We then walked around the sleepy town-EVERYTHING was closed including the grocery store.  That was crazy!  Til tomorrow....Dueces!

OMG!!!

Today started off well...well Saturday did.  Chelsea got me to the airport on time and after I checked in I sat down to play with my phone I realized that my phone was still in the car.  I tried to call Chelsea but realized that I don't know her number.  I tried to call my phone, and what I thought was Chelsea's number to no avail, and I even called my mother to see if she would call the kid for me...no answer.  I finally tried my house phone and they were there.  Chelsea said she would be right there so I went out and waited.  15 minutes before my flight she finally pulled up with my key.  As I made my way back to my gate, nearly in a sprint I made it to my gate just before the ladies were going to page me! \Ugghh!  The flight was largely uneventful except for the horrible crap they tried to pass off as FOOD.  Dinner was a fiasco of Southwest Chicken with mushy rice.  Breakfast the next morning was damn near CRIMINAL! They served a monstrosity of and English \muffin egg sandwich in which the eggs had peppers and tasted of vinegar! \No one around me ate a bite of that mess...settling for the lone unripened banana instead. 
When we got to Rugeley, we went to Dawn's mom's house to celebrate her mom Gillian's birthday and Father's Day for both Billy and Graham.  We had an awesome traditional Sunday Roast dinner complete with homemade cheesecake made by Dawn's grandma.  We were all stuffed like pigs! What a great day! Til tomorrow-Deuces!

Crooked back

The start of my marathon day was at the Aragon Chiropractor.  Where he proceeded to tell me that my spine is crooked as shit!  That I lean forward like some damn cro magnon and that I will be hunched over in my old age....IF we don't do something now!  He did however, tell  me that my muscle tone is awesome!  I ended my day finding out that my car repairs are gonna cost me upwards of $1000! What the hell!  I guess I better kick up my side hustles and get that money! Oh, and then I began my marathon cooking session that consisted of me preparing every dish I could think of so my kid will not have to cook for the next couple of weeks.  My freezer is ridiculous right now. But honestly there's something pretty great about having your food already to go-I should do this more often! Do you cook like that? Take a weekend to prepare the week's meals? It's really kinda smart for us busy dames you know....give it a shot, you just might be on to something.  Note to self....buy stock in freezer bags! :) Dueces

What a day!!!

My goodness today was a busy one! I must however first mention an update on BBW from last night's reunion episode. Evelyn and Jennifer made up!!! Not a dry eye in the place (or absence of  sideways glance). It was refreshing to see them make up but I still wonder if it was just to save their paychecks.  Either way...my new favorite reality love is CHICAGOLICIOUS! That show is ridiculous! It makes Jerseylicious look like child's play and I LOVE it!
After dealing with a crook in my neck for forever, I finally decided that this must be taken care of before I get on a plane on Saturday for an international flight and this neck is nothing too nice right now.  I had to take my car to the shop for some routine maintenance also in preparation for my trip. I dropped it off this morning, took the bus home and walked my happy ass to the chiropractor's office about 2 miles from my house (might be a slight exaggeration). Did I mention it was 9am and probably 90 degrees by that time.  I got to the appointment all sweaty and crooky wanting neck relief asap. It was hot as hell in that office damn it! But what was I gonna do?  There is nothing like the skills of a chiropractor or massage therapist! Their hands are guided by God and they do great work.  I love them with all my heart!  After my appointment thanks to my awesome Groupon.com certificate I got (I get an exam and 4 adjustments for $49)! Beat that!  I love me some Groupons baby!  Get on that Groupon bandwagon and save yourself some moolah too!
This afternoon I had the great misfortune to sit my butt down to finally take care of this speeding ticket by taking the class on-line. I was ready to shoot myself after an hour of trying to stay awake and attentive. I would have rather given up a coveted Saturday afternoon rather than live through the nearly 4 hours it took to complete that damned on-line class! Never again!!!! Okay, maybe I should never speed again, that's a better statement.
Now that that's all complete, just trying to figure out why the hell CP Auto Chasers did not call me to tell me my car was done! WTH! That bad boy better be done by tomorrow afternoon, or we are gonna have problems!  Wait a damn minute! That means I have to walk my happy ass back to the chiropractor's office AGAIN tomorrow! NOT HAPPY!!!!!

Must See TV?

There's been a lot of drama about violence in the reality shows we watch on TV now. Basketball Wives has petitions surfacing regarding the extreme violence portrayed every single week. I admit it, I'm guilty of tuning in and watching like we watch train wrecks and car accidents. I love me some crazy ass Tammy Roman, Evelyn Lozada, Drita D'Avanzano and Renee Graziano of Mob Wives. If but for nothing else but the crazy one-liners, the shows are pretty much pointless. The majority of the on-camera action consists of the women sitting down to "calmly" discuss their "beefs". which ALWAYS end in violence. BBW is by far the worse of the two and that is surely why they are being scrutinized for their questionable portrayal of "professional" women AND mothers. I hope there is something done about this rampant violence, because I can't,  in good conscience support these types of shows. Classic Evelyn:"You are a non mother effen factor!" (uncensored of course)! And Drita:"asking me if I care is like asking me how much sodium is in soy sauce! I could give a F!(again uncensored). Recently, both Evelyn and Tammy have come out and made public apologies for their behavior and have expressed their willingness and need for personal growth and change.  I wonder if it is at all motivated by the fact that their contracts are potentially on the chopping block otherwise? I will miss you ladies, but I am hopeful that you will find a more peaceful solution to the issues you have both on and off camera.

Camel Toe....I don't think so

I'm not sure if you all watch Duets, but on the other day's episode John Legend was rocking some seriously tight pants. I had lunch with my girl Porcia (not her REAL name, as she told me she NEVER wants to be mentioned on this blog) and when I mentioned the show, that was the first thing that came out of her mouth! We cracked up laughing while we searched our brains for what is the proper terminology for what John had going on!  Those pants, while fitting with the theme of the song (Grapevine) were appropriate. I'm sure not a Pip, Temptation, or Top woulda rocked some pants looking like that.  I swear to you it looked like a damn VAGINA camel toe! Now we are clear on how he can hit those high notes he sings so easily.  A mess I tell you!
Not to be outdone, mind you by "Young Thicke" as he referred to himself..Mr. Robin Thicke.  He, himself was rocking some super tight skinny jeans that I guess fit with his song choice too (Crazy in Love).  He too, has now cleared up his amazing ability to hit Mariah Carey type notes.  Dear boys, BURN THOSE DAMN SKINNY PANTS! They are NEVER the answer.  Until the next time...Deuces!

Two-a-days aren't just for Football players

That's right ladies and gentlemen, you read it correctly! This chick is doing two-a-days in the gym! Now that school's out for summer (sing it to yourself), I have all of this extra time to dedicate to losing all those LB's that found their way to my body in the last 9 months. That's the length of a school year....not referring to the length of a pregnancy! Although, horrifyingly enough I seem to weigh as much as I did when I was 9 months pregnant, hence the 2-a-days!
So, I'm doing all I can to get this weight off. Okay not really, because that cake and ice cream AND Oreo cookies I continue to eat are not helping the situation ONE BIT!  I don't however, skip out on the gym.....much! It has been a crazy week and therefore I missed a bit, but I went tonight and in my favorite cardio room at my local Platinum Fitness facility they were playing AVATAR. A movie I had no inclination to watch at all. I hesitated to get on the treadmill for my 20 minute run, but I did. Lo and behold the movie was near the end and I only got to watch the last 10 minutes of it while I ran. And who's gonna sit or run if you will, through a freakin' black screen with credits rolling for what seems like an hour? (See..Wolverine) Not me! 20 minutes cut down to 10 just like that.  I didn't run out just yet though, I did hit up the core area and make it happen over there until my stomach was on fire.  Now none of my gym "boyfriends" were in sight so I made a bee line outta there, past the murky pool, which even though it's over 100 degrees I hesitate to get in. Somethin's just not right there.
What did I eat for dinner you ask?  Damn May's Chicken and Waffles!  I know, I know, I'm an idiot! All that hard work for nothing! But listen! I had a great deal from Groupon for an awesome meal and I just couldn't pass it up.  If you know anything about me, you know I'm cheap as hell and any opportunity for me to save a buck, I'm all over it! Until next time....Deuces!

What am I doing here?

In this day and age of multimedia overload, I am stepping foot into the realm of sharing with the masses.  WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?! Due to making my friends laugh at my sometimes outrageous Facebook status updates, my friends have encouraged me to just go ahead and make a blog. So here it is!  I hope to continue to entertain you with my caustic wit (as a dude once told me....I had to look it up), funny stories and my general hilarity.  Who knows if that will happen, but here goes nothing!